The Soulmate Myth

The Soulmate is a monstrous lie.

I say this not because I hate love, but because I love love.

The concept of the Soulmate comes from Plato's Symposium, where a group of dudes attempt to answer the question, What Is Love? One of the philosophers shares the creation myth of a four-armed, four-legged and two-faced creature. Zeus the thunder god, feels threatened by this powerful creature and decides to split this beast in two, creating male and female. Each person has a counterpart they are in search for, distracting them from threatening the gods. Today, the idea of the Soulmate threatens our understanding of love.

The Soulmate myth undermines love by morphing it into selfishness. It becomes selfishness in two ways. The first is by making us think that we are needed to complete someone else. This isn't love but arrogance. The other way the Soulmate is selfish is that it says a specific person is required for your happiness. This places ridiculous expectations on a partner which no person can fulfill.

The lie of the Soulmate says I am incomplete when I do not have my specific spouse. Love says I am complete because I am able to love and be loved. Sacrificial love is what binds people together and is at the center of all types of healthy relationships.  Love is not self-seeking, it is not arrogant, nor is it needy. Love is giving without expecting anything in return. It is continual acts of love that make relationships last.